Thursday, March 10, 2011

9 1/2 weeks

I have less then 10 weeks until our little girl makes her big arrival. I have some very mixed emotions about the whole thing. Of course I am so excited and I can't wait to see her and hold her, but I am also scared for a bazillion different reasons.
First, will my son react poorly to all the attention his sister gets? I really want to make sure that he knows how much we love him and that this baby is just someone else to love and not a replacement.
I am worried that I will be a tired monster and that all of those sleepless nights will equate to tearful fights with the hubby.
I am also sad that I will not have very much leave this time around. I think that I will have enough leave to take off a full 6 weeks and then work part time for two more. That is just not enough. I have friends who took off between 4-6 months and sadly that is just not a luxury I have. I could of course take unpaid leave, but as the main breadwinner we could not survive financially if I did.
 And my last fear is very selfish and silly and if anyone actually read this blog I would be embaressed for even saying it. But I am afraid of what my body will look like. So far I have gained almost 30lbs, and I still have 10 more weeks. With Bodhi I gained 35lbs, but was able to drop 90% of it by the time I came home from the hospital. And even then I knew I would be getting pregnant again so I wasn't too concerned with "getting into shape". But this time is the last time, and I know I need to get into shape. I know that I can't start working out right away, but hopefully with the better weather we can go for lots of walks. And I guess I will have to stop asking Jay to go to the store to buy me ice cream and cookies!!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

My job gives me a headache

Up until about two years ago I really liked my job. I have been with the same organization since 2002 and doing primarily the same job, but with extra things thrown in each year. Being pregnant definitely changes things though. I am a chemist, so when I am pregnant I can't touch any chemicals. It can be a challenge to find something interesting and meaningful to do while I am pregnant, but this time around I have been up to my ears in work.
I review data from other labs and I take it very seriously. So much so that people wonder why I am questioning the words of others. Well, if I am going to put my signature on something I want to believe in it. I want to know that the data is good, and not just trust what someone else says. And of course, people give me grief when I question them or the data, but I don't care. I take pride in my work whether its on the bench or at my desk.